While talking to parents this week at the Truessence premier class, Talking To Your Teens About Sex, I referenced a hormone called prolactin.
This hormone has many good traits and is a powerful resource for our body’s efficient functioning. But, there is one interesting interchange that causes prolactin to start to spin out of control: STRESS.
Parents, have you ever felt stress when wanting to talk to your kids or teens about sex?
Yes? Well then, you have experienced a rise in prolactin that floods into your brain. When this flooding occurs, it emits outward and literally goes before us! Our conversation is then riddled with this hormone acting like a cloud between us and our teen. The crazy part? Our children actually experience this hormone emanating from our bodies; they experience our fear and their own fear.
Yes, teenagers have fear about this topic as well. Yet, I believe they are open, to having conversations about sexuality and spirituality. How do we do this?
On Sunday, I referenced a great book I’ve ready called Anatomy Of The Soul by Curt Thompson, M.D. It’s a rather technical book, but contains some great insights that examine the science of how a person experiences being known and the impact this has on the body/brain connection. I encourage you to pick it up and give it a read if that kind of technical reading interests you! If it doesn’t, not to worry, just stay tuned and I’ll keep giving you great nuggets of helpful info. My pleasure, really!
A question: can we reduce the ill-effect of this hormone and have it return to it’s healthy design within our bodies?
Yes! But only if we acknowledge that the stress…the fear…is there. If we recognize what we are experiencing and dare to venture to the risky ground of naming it, we can call that prolactin back and quiet its raging impact. Science has actually proven this.
If you want to have real conversations with your teenagers about sex, the place to begin is by being honest. Hard but true, we are both experiencing stress around this topic.
What if we invite our teenagers to put aside their fear by modeling it first. Maybe saying something like this:
“You know it feels kind of scary to say this out loud, but I feel nervous talking to you about sexuality. But I really do have some experience on this whole topic, otherwise you wouldn’t be here right? Sex is wild and wonderful and because I REALLY love you, I want to not let my fear build a wall between us…let’s figure this out together how to talk about it.”
I wonder what could happen if we just went for it and put it out there!